Never a goodbye !
WL Warni *
Few years back I remember, I ignored your existence for days and at the moment, I am unable to recall on what grounds I was fuming at you.
Only if, I could have cultured myself to lease off emotions, then perhaps I would have discontinued the drama. Life has been quiet, many things seem to transform, for good or bad, only Heaven knows.
I try convincing myself to be as see-through as possible at all times, no matter at what position I am in. Except, what I unsighted was the line which I failed to bridge the gap between us.
Several fine nights, you came into a scene in my dream and I could merely see you from afar. Thanking the Creator is the lone means which fuses my broken heart and I am pleased.
Away from home in a foreign place, I hope you are sleeping well. For years we have bid numerous farewells to your dear ones, some departed with no final words, some you spent their end moments with.
And all these funerals of others I tag all along with you, and few years shortly , we had to convey all the agonizing news as your strength had been decline bit by bit .
And today, you as well have followed their footprints. If I am given an opportunity to compensate for anything today, then I will unquestionably request for you.
Back then, it gets on my nerves because you kept poking on every miniature things I do, from sleeping to getting up, from brushing my hair to wearing my outfit, from sitting to walking, and so and so.
Little did I know, that close watch was what I required the most to be a little appreciable and acceptable person I am today.
If I get to breathe longer in this world from now on, I will go on narrating about you as my favourite tale for generations and generations how much an inspiration you are to me. Only if, I could have said “Thank you”, then, perhaps I would breathe better.
I fail to see you leave, because I had to complete something mandatory at that time. I am still learning to open the door and to stand, walk and grow independently.
We all know how painful it was and it is still, and we don’t converse about it not because we are heartless. We are constantly nurturing at all sides.
I will not fail to remember the person who lend a hand when we were in need, and you have name some as well. Your teachings will ceaselessly be in my heart. I do remember and will always remember. May the
Heaven also return the blessings to those who showed bounteousness to our family. We could not bid farewell to each other in person, let it be. The sky may give an impression of emptiness, let it be.
If they name me unfortunate, let it be. You are persistently in my heart and mind.
“Never a Goodbye” until we meet.
* WL Warni wrote this article for The Sangai Express
This article was webcasted on 03 July 2023.
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