Life Skills for Children!

G S Oinam *

Education begins at home, and parents are jointly responsible for developing high moral value of children to ensure a bright future of our children. The right school for our children is not about the big brand, but about the value it teaches its students. All schools are equally good and working towards better result.

The different between schools is more about imagery than substantial. While the schools competes each other for better result, they churn out smart and confident students. We must nurture our children for longer challenges called life armed with qualities of character, compassion and courage.

1. Character: - Employs wrongful means to achieve our children the desired result of marks may lead to pleasure for a short time, but never gives happiness in the long run. It is the responsibility of both parents and schools to teach children the right conduct, good moral character.

2. Compassion: - You may have rich but it does not matter how you achieve wealth. But, school is the learning centre for kids from different family backgrounds. Children need to be taught to look beyond them and work towards the happiness of self and environment, appreciate and enjoy what they have. There is strong interdependence between us and our environment. Therefore, schools and parents must maintain the quality of compassion and ensure that there in no loud and noise about the rich and poor, and equally participation of all section of the society. Parents need to ensure that they lead by example of non-discrimination in the name of cast, wealth, religion and behaviour.

3. Courage: - Courage is more than confidence, physical, emotional and social power etc. It is about the mindset where children are encourage fighting for the rights, asking questions and challenge the status quo. Teachers must encourage students to ask questions, no matter how stupid student may be; what they believe is without worrying about the repercussion of speaking.

Parents are often seeing their own image in their children. Whenever, there is examination time, tragically in the stress even to heart attack tendency. The pressure of high grades is build up because of limited seat available to elite collages and admission takes place purely on marks obtained and eventually which lead towards career options. The inordinately high expectation of pussy parents, the fear of loosing face among the peer groups and in the society, and dread of not being able to get child's admission to higher class reduce the parents mind to be quivering jelly.

However, S.C. Arora, Vice Chairman, Lotus Valley International, Noida, is opinion that good grades are not the only assessment of student's talent. Your child may have talents beyond the academic realm also; acknowledge those talents and encourage kids to explore their potentials. Our examination system is only able to test cramming power.

Howard Gardener, in his theory of multiple intelligences and abilities, has classified intelligence under nine heads viz, linguistic verbal, logical mathematical, visual spatial, body-kinesthetic, musical rhythmic, inter personal, intra personal, naturalist and existentialist etc. Your child may have musical talents or architectural ability or marketing skills but may not do very well academically. She/ he may be creative genius or a sports enthusiast.

Cricketer MS Dhoni still doing graduation, Miss World, Priyanka Choppra was recently conferred honourary degree in acting without considering her real academic attainment. Did anybody ask the academic achievement of Manipuri women boxer Merry Kom or Dingku Singh? But, they are all already achieved unparallel success. Do you know about Lata Mangesker's performance in her class XII Board exam? We should keep in mind that learning of subjects, although is important, but it is not the sole aim of educating a child. What is important is that the child should be learning life skills and attitudes through these subjects, says expert.

Every child can not be C.V. Raman or Dr. Radhakrishnan. Most of the successful people who held the height of top industrialist, CEOs in MNC and the man who are promoted to the rank of General in the arm forces have done well in life but were average or at the most above average in studies. They were certainly not 'Gold Medalist'; however, decidedly, they were good in other fields.

One may win Oscar award and another may invent a model; one may be average in studies but very good in public relations. What should we concern is about life skills like listening patiently, communicating efficiently, empathizing with people, anger management, emotional management, discipline etc. These are the qualities of good fishing which will enable us to face the vicissitudes of life, says experts. Teaching in Sanjoy Dutta's" Munabhai MBBS' and Tisca Choppra's "Taare Zameen Par" has given a lesion to our society for understanding and listen to children.

Well, of course, mostly we bring up kids without realizing that this is our highest contribution to the planet and its well being. "The kids who had a grandfather who always told them that one day they will become President of USA and gave them the confidence from the early childhoods actually went on to become John. F. Kennedy, the former President of USA. At the same time, the kids from an abusive family with constant negative reinforcements went on to become Lee Oswald, the man who murdered John F. Kennedy" says Arbindam Chaudhori, Editor of Sunday Times.

Children should develop a hobby which will help them to develop confidence and relax later in life. Let them read books work and play regularly but they must learn to relax as well. Let them realized that hard work never goes wasted. Gradually, they will have the feeling of getting excellent marks are good but it is not the way of life. They should do their best and leave the result to Almighty.

Many of the parents, even from well educated families are aggravating the stress caused by a flawed exam. result of children. These are the things to be avoided, instead, the best way is to communicate children freely and frankly so that children can share the problems they are facing about. Every parent likes to keep remote control in hands but don't rag them all the time. Let them realized there is a life beyond grades and give a wings to children to see them how to fly!

How to crack the code right of children: (Opinion of Dr. Vasantha R. Patri, Chairperson, Indian Institute of Counseling, New Delhi.):-

1. Anxiety in Children: It is parents who are responsible for making children nervous. An emotionally secure child can easily adopt a new situation, and is happier and healthier.
2. Deal with it: Make a child feel emotionally secure. Understand a child's need with love and attention. This makes the child comfortable.
3. Children and health: Help children stay healthy. Children need 10-12 hours of sleep a day. If they do not get it, they tend to get cranky, listless, tired and show poor balanced diet and is in bed by 8 PM. Healthy children are always ready to learn.
4. Develop a routine: Make a routine and help them follow it. Do not make a frequent change in a child's room, timings, schedules of sleep, eating, playing etc. A routine gives structures and make a child secure.
5. Teach good habits: Good toilet habits, bladder control, sound sleep, good digestion etc. come from regularity. These are important for school life. Good habits go a long way in making a child grow up into a good human being.
6. Stimulation is a must: Provide children with a lot of stimulation. Stimulation is a tonic for developing a child's brain. Tell stories to your child. Read stories openly in front of them. Sing and dance with children in only old way. Play with children outing to parks, and grocery stores and explain things to them. This helps the children preparedness for learning because they get curious and motivated to know and learn things.
7. Expose a child to world: Children want to know and understand around them. So, talk to them and answer their questions. Take them to new different places and let them see and do things on their own. This way, they will learn and relate to things better, and can be a good introduction.
8. Love a child: To kindle the fire in every child, warm the heart. If a child feels loved and wanted, she feels glad. When this happens, he or she is enthusiastic and willing to learn, obey and please everyone around. A child who feels loved becomes more receptive in nature.