Dear Friends and Countrymen,

Please lend me your ears....if I were the CM of Manipur, I would, amongst others, do the following (unilaterally..no words like consultation', 'approval', 'consent' etc. exist in my dictionary, forgive me!):-

a. Rename Manipur as 'USM' (United States of Manipur), but without infringing any 'trademark or copyright' right on the acronym 'USA'.

b. Redesignate the post of Chief Minister as 'President, USM'.

c. Convert all Hilly regions into tourist attractions with cable cars, modern hotels, swimming pools etc.

d. Intense campaign in the World media - both print and electronic on the lines of Malaysia - if not 'truly Asia'.. it should be 'truly Manipur - Switzerland Redefined' or something like that.

e. Convert all insurgent groups (with due respect to their causes) into 'Tourist Guide Companies' or 'Travel Agencies' with their first-hand knowledge of the Hilly tracks and inherent 'Sharit Shara'.

f. Ask Mr. Muiva to conquer Burma and form a 'Geater Nagaland' and exist as a 'friendly neighbor', like a good boy.

g. Ask all our Leishabis to make Shingjus and Boras in such a way that the tourists can have them without breathing heavily.

h. Encourage all our Pakhangs to learn some fundamentals of English to enable them to at least say .. 'I am from the United States of Manipur... What can I do for you, Sir or Madam ?"... (Hope it does not turn out to be such great English sentences like 'I am Manipur from The_ Inquisitive .. All are sit down!').

i. Make the Ima Keithel an Exclusive Zone for the Manipuris only least its does not become a great 'distraction' for the tourists with 'SARS-Mouth-Covers'.

j. Promote water sports in places like Loktak, Numbul Turel, Imphal Turel etc. and remove all those 'dirty things' (hope you get it correctly) from their banks.

k. Take all our 'Rickshaw drivers' for a one month crash course on 'good behavior and good vocabulary' to places like Uganda, Somalia, Cameroon etc. and to earnestly request the 'All Manipur Ricksaw Drivers Association' to issue a directive to all its members to stop wearing the 'headgear'.

l. Last but the most important, make myself as the President for just another fifty years.

I do believe that you would be sympathetic to my cause and from my part, I assure you that I would rule the 'United States of Manipur' like the way Saddam was ruling Iraq, Musshraf in Pakistan or for that reason, Charles Taylor in Liberia !!

With Warm Regards,

The_Inquisitive