Never forget that falling in love is a serious business
Shreeprakash Sharma *
Prateek, a 17-year-old boy of class XII in a prestigious private school, always topped his class and this made his parents and teachers proud of him. His parents wanted to see him as an IAS officer. Things had been going very well in the right direction until he reached home when his school closed for two months. Prateek's parents were amazed to find his son bizarrely distracted and disappointed.
Unlike past few years, this time he preferred to stay alone and avoided the company of his bosom friends he used to once dote upon. Nor was he very serious in his study. He would keep sleeping or engaging in the talk on his mobile phone. Prateek had totally changed and this disturbing situation made his parents very worried and alarmed.
When the things aggravated from worse to worst, Prateek's mummy got restless. One evening while Prateek was lying in his bed, his mother came to him with tea and very affectionately yet very fearfully asked him, "My son, what has happened to you? I have been watching that you have not been behaving naturally and nor living your life normally since you have come here. Do not get scared and tell me the problems which have fallen you."
Mom's question came to Prateek as a bolt from the blue and it touched his heart.
But Prateek tried to hide the agonies which had been gnawing away at his mental peace. The answer which Prateek gave to his mother was not at all satisfying and convincing,
"Nothing mom. Why do you think so? I am alright and very much fine. There is nothing to worry about mom!"
But the mom did not buy what his son tried to put as the pretext of what has been harassing him and stealing the mental peace. She kept quiet for some moments and finally said,
"But things are not the same my son since you have reached home. I can see you are so mentally disturbed. There is something wrong which has been perplexing you. You are my son, and I can well understand your pain and predicament. Tell me everything clearly without any fear my boy. We are more experienced and have also seen the world. May be we can help you to destress you and come out from a swirling vortex of the dilemmas and confusions."
Prateek could not hide anything any longer and began crying bitterly clinging to her mother. He finally started narrating what has stolen his heart and bereft him of his mental peace, "Mom, in fact I have fallen in love with Simran, my class mate and it has now reached out to the point where I have been finding myself quite incapable of managing the situation. I love her so much mom and I cannot live without her now. I want to marry her. Simran is also ready to elope to marry me. Now you tell me mom what I should do. I am in a big quandary."
Now it was the turn of Prateek's mother to get stunned. But very soon she controlled herself and broke the silence. She made him understand what marriage meant and what responsibilities were associated with what he did not know is going to be one of the biggest challenges of life. However, it was not easier for Prateek to understand what his mother tried to enlighten him about but very soon the situation became crystal clear and Prateek succeeded recovering himself.
Prateek returned to school after the summer vacation but with the unbelievable U-turn changes in his perception about life and marriages. In fact, the case of Prateek may seem to be an anecdote but the love stories of this ilk are galore, especially in this revolutionary age of the social media and the information technology.
An important question arises here – Can the very natural and innate human sentiment like that of love be avoided as an essential evil?
The second question which also raises its head in the anticipation of an answer is – What precautions must be taken even if one fails to prevent himself from falling in love?
It is not hard to accept that love is the most intrinsic emotion of the Homo sapiens.
But falling in the love at the age of adolescence which is considered as the golden period from the career formation point of view may prove to be incongruous and very destructive. Because falling in love is such a phenomenon which calls for fulfilling a lot of promises.
It also heavily disturbs the concentration power so badly required in the serious study and business. Falling in love at the stage of student life, though beyond one's control and conscience, is like a double-edged sword and so one needs to be very cautious.
Money plays important role in love, especially in this age of materialistic world. Economic interdependence must be treated as the prerequisite for starting liking and loving someone. And what about physical intimacy? In fact, love generally is considered as the licence of indulging in what we may call the sexual promiscuity.
The breed of pure and platonic love has amazingly been on the fast wane. So when in love one must be wary about what they want from this relationship- body or heart?
Love is a great sacrifice. It must not be treated as barter system which involves exchange of expensive gifts.
Helping someone you love to reach him or her to the pinnacle of success is true love. Doing your best to bail your sweet hearts out from the difficult situation is the truer love.
Having the intense and undying feelings of empathy and sympathy with whom you love is the truest love which runs slow but lasts the longest.
* Shreeprakash Sharma wrote this article for The Sangai Express
The writer is Principal of Jawahar Navodaya Vidyalaya, Dinthar Veng, Mamit, Mizoram and can be reached at 9939131704 or spsharma(DOT)rishu(AT)gmail(DOT)com
This article was webcasted on March 26, 2019.
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