E-Pao! Canadian born confused desi

Canadian Born Confused Desi
By Muskan Mittal

Light! Camera! Action! I came out from my mother's tummy. Thats when the story started, the story of a Canadian Born Confused Desi (CBCD).

Who am I? What am I? Where do I belong to? Which culture and tradition should I follow? What do I call myself? A canadian? An indian? A meitei or a so called "mayang"? Pheww!!!

For a start, I am a girl with an Indian background, born and raised in Canada. I call myself a canadian because am born and raised here? Or do I call myself an Indian because I have an Indian background? And if i do call myself an Indian, am I a mayang or a meitei?

My dad is a mayang and mom is a wonderful meitei leima (don't mind if the word is incorrect). I guess am half meitei and half mayang. STUCK IN THE MIDDLE HUH!!!. So...should I do both "karwa chauth" and "ningol chakouba"? Well...some people call me "MDH" masala and even "chana chur" (not sure about spelling). But hey!!...they are tasty! (can't leave that part).

As I grew older, I started searching for my true identity. Where do i actually belong? I can't say Manipur because that is not quite right. Should I say India? But which part of India? I speak english just like a Canadian, French...hmm...don't ask, Hindi...i think am pretty good and Manipuri!! Manipuri pronunciation is really really...good, like the way meitei says "kwa" (pan) I say it as "kouwa" which sounds like crow in Hindi.

I remember the first time (may be not first time but the one I remember) I visited india, especially Manipur, a fantastic, wonderful place. I felt like I'm someone that belong there, which is not true....I actually couldn't believe it when tears ran down on my cheeks when I was about to leave such a "babaroma babalicious" (lovely) place.

For the past few years, I tried to find out more and more about my roots and the more I came to know, more and more questions started popping out of my head. I have been searching for the answers for a loong time and I'll keep searching. Sometimes...I asked myself, Am I a person that doesn't fit in at all in those two backgrounds that I have? Well..DUH!!

Many people ask thousands of question about my background and lot more......well...what can I say? "Oh please!...this poor girl is suffering from "confusia"..hehehe. Excuse moi! GIMME A BREAK!

* Comments posted by users in this discussion thread and other parts of this site are opinions of the individuals posting them (whose user ID is displayed alongside) and not the views of We strongly recommend that users exercise responsibility, sensitivity and caution over language while writing your opinions which will be seen and read by other users. Please read a complete Guideline on using comments on this website.

  • Khuman Lampak :: 360 Panorama
  • Do we need Sanamahi & Umang Lai #4
  • Sweat after Life : Poem
  • Hypothyroidism: patient needs to know #2
  • Nupi Sabis of Manipur #2
  • Tobacco Free Institutions: Gallery
  • Irom Sharmila released #2: Gallery
  • Natl Games, Manipur contingent: Gallery
  • National Voters Day observed
  • Pre-Match Report: Lajong vs Mumbai
  • Nehginpao conferred PhD degree
  • Condemns re-arrest of Irom Sharmila
  • Hoo Chage #3 :: eRang
  • Climate Change & Global Warming
  • Not prescribed for young tots
  • Tamenglong #33: Wallpaper Download
  • Manglaba Angangs :: Poem
  • A nostalgic moment of a lifetime
  • Il Buono, il bruto, il cattivo
  • SC Judgement on Transgenders..illusion
  • NE blips on Delhi air plans
  • Jobs @Regional Mental Health, Assam
  • Sharmila should not be rearrested
  • Drama of release and re-arrest
  • Between the lines writ on the wall
  • Irom Sharmila re-arrested : Gallery
  • Yubi Lakpi #2 : Gallery
  • Lunglaipou, Jenthoi : eMing
  • NE women problems in metropolises #1
  • The Last Tears : Poem
  • Helping man's best friend: Gallery
  • Anti-rabies vaccination camps at CCpur
  • PhD Programme at IIT, Indore
  • Delhi Protest against misappropriation
  • WIM Cup 2014: football at Bangalore
  • Ibopishak Memorial Football Tournament
  • Vistara to start flights to NE India
  • Special strategy to tackle HIV-AIDS in NE
  • Irom Sharmila released #1: Gallery
  • Tell tale stories of 'half widows'
  • Condition of ISBT, Imphal: Gallery
  • Road safety & save use of fuel
  • Farewell, My Winged Words : Poem
  • Why man wants mother..but not daughter?
  • CC Meet: TRUGPU Vs TRAU #4 : Gallery
  • Jigsaw Puzzle #1 :: Story
  • 2nd Batch: Agriculture Coaching in Manipur
  • Reqt @R Info Solutions, Imphal
  • Walkathon: Road Safety Week #1: Gallery
  • CBSE on cigarettes sale near schools
  • Blast exposes security chinks
  • 43rd Statehood Day celebrated in Manipur
  • From Make in India to Make in NE
  • Rupali Longjam - Miss NE #2 :: eRang
  • Reduction in incidences: No need for AFSPA
  • Rabies outbreak & unsolicited 'hysteria'
  • Case study of MNF movement #5
  • Dear JC! : Poem
  • World Bank meeting CM : Gallery
  • Anti-Rabies Vaccination : Gallery
  • RIST Lecture: 'Embedded System' @MU
  • Domestic helpers requested to register
  • Memo to Information & Broadcasting Minister
  • Manipur to send 403 players
  • Centre to boost NE pipeline network
  • Readying for Class X & Class XII exams
  • Haunting RIMS with missing documents
  • Kerala model of development, Analysis #1
  • Generating vision & colonial imageries
  • Kamuching platinum jubilee #2: Gallery
  • Oath & ordeal: The Zeliangrongs #2
  • Combing operations @Kwakeithel: Gallery
  • Tobacco Free Institutions awareness prog
  • Cassay Horse trails & Eastern Gate #2
  • Ambulances distributed to ADC: Gallery
  • Elegance of Dancing looms #5: Gallery
  • Sanarembi Cheishra : Funga
  • Mathang gi Yengningthada #1: Gallery
  • Dr. Naorem Bidyasagar : Akademi Award
  • Emoinu @Yumnam Leikai #2: Gallery
  • Dr Naorem Bidyasagar: Gallery
  • Snowfall in Ukhrul : Gallery
  • Puya Mei Thakhibagi Kumon : Gallery
  • CC Meet: TRAU Vs TRUGPU #2 : Gallery
  • CC Meet final: TRAU Vs TRUGPU : Summary
  • TRAU : Complete Team Player Profile
  • TRUGPU : Complete Team Player Profile
  • CC Meet: 2nd Semi: MOM: Gallery
  • CC Meet: 1st Semi: MOM: Gallery
  • Reshmi Sorokhaibam #3 :: eRang
  • Ningel to keep afloat dying culture
  • Laihui presents Hada Shamaton :: Ooba
  • Kongba Maru Laipham : Gallery
  • Wishes for 2015
  • Tangkhul Folk Song :: Ooba
  • Delhi Discrimination Survey: Download